“Yeh jism pyaar karna nahi jaanta. jaanta hai toh sirf jism ki bhookh.“
This country is facing a problem. Ok, that’s a stupid understatement, we’re facing a gazillion plus one problems. Obviously we will address all of them in the next 74 years. This article will help us accomplish that objective immensely. This will address the problem that enrages us the most.
Our country frowns upon the act of P.D.A. That’s funny considering the amount of D.A we do in closed areas and the number of homeless people. We do have the largest population in the world, don’t we? We are also called the rape and molestation capital of the world. One big factor of this problem is our upbringing and beliefs. We are always told to bottle up physical desires. Maybe if we learnt to loosen up a little we would not have so many issues resulting out of sexual tension. So here are ways in which we think this problem could be tackled:
1. Public Mein Karneka Bantai!
We could use some areas where the poor and helpless get to make out without the threat of the cops and moral police hanging over their head. These could be special zones in public parks, beaches or others. Or maybe entire areas dedicated to the lovin’ breed. It does sound gross eventually, but then in times of desperation a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. This is more for the not so well to do brothers. These people live in small houses with a huge family including elders and that obviously does not give them an opportunity to play the adult games. Rumour has it that the cops allow couples in cars to have some uninterrupted time at Bandra reclamation post sunrise for a couple of hours. But if you get caught, be ready to cough up a hefty bribe.
2. Drive-in Movie Screenings
(Idea credit: SnehaNair)
You drive to a beautiful locale outside of the city rush. Park your car and watch a movie or concert on a huge screen and have your will inside the perimeter of your car. Geenyuss!
Why has India not evolved to embrace this concept? Because physical intimacy even in your vehicle is not permissible. My vote in the next election is up for sale to whichever party promises to set up a few drive throughs around every Metro.
3. With love, tumhari Government
Simple idea. Fill a form. Cite your skills. Use those skills to serve the community or government for a set number of hours. Voila! The government shows its appreciation by giving you a free weekend couples stay in one of it’s plush guest houses anywhere in the country. Just like a geyser converts electrical energy into thermal energy, this program will convert sexual energy into community service. Imagine a guy who cannot afford a decent room with the money he makes. What is his fault for not getting a chance to let his fluids flow without fear for once. This will be his shot. He can take the love of his life to a beautiful city, in a beautiful government hotel/guesthouse and enjoy. Just like them movies!
4. Saadhu ban ja...
Or keep working your right hand out. Maybe this will help: The Stranger
